“Bein’ faithful ain’t worth a plugged nickel!”
She said. “I ain’t sayin’ a gal should be fickle,
But fuck! What’s the harm,
When men turn on the charm,
In a bit of good ol’ slap ‘n’ tickle?”
Tag: limerick
Switch-hitter
She remained still naive and complacent,
Her sweet sexuality nascent…
The treacherous bloke
Switched his target mid-stroke…
From her cunt to the hole just adjacent!
Heads or tails?
If you’d tried giving head, which she had,
You’d most likely, like her, have been glad
To go straight to the fuck,
(And just skip the damn suck),
Which, in retrospect, wasn’t so bad.
Beguiled
Though voluptuous, rather a child,
She was easily charmed and beguiled;
Flattered, wildly impressed,
She was swiftly undressed,
And deflowered, debauched and defiled.
Oral testimony
Who’d have guessed, when she’d seemed so aloof?
“Gosh!” he said. “Won’t your Dad hit the roof?”
“Well, he would, if he knew,”
She said, “seeing it’s you,
But he won’t, since I’ve swallowed the proof!”
Cabin fever
As the wife of a woodsman, the thing
Is, all summer it’s green, the birds sing
But, the first dump of snow,
Ain’t no place you can go,
Just get screwed, day and night, until spring!
Frontierswoman
“In the wild, huntin’ beavers ‘n’ bears,
Ain’t no puttin’ on graces ‘n’ airs;
A gal’s pussy’s fair game,
‘N’ her ass just the same…
Fuck or fight!” she said. “Fuck it. Who cares?”
On the market
Saucy look, bit more tit, bit more leg …
Yeah, like Mum says, he’s rough, a bad egg…
But she’d fuck him like that!
She’s not ugly, not fat …
Fuckin’ hell! Does a girl have to beg?
Factotum
He was body guard, butler and chauffeur,
Factotum and minder, her go-fer.
He swept, cooked her food,
When she felt in the mood,
Also gave a fair fuck on the sofa.
Impatience
She’d discreetly inserted her diaphragm.
“Maybe just lift your leg higher, Ma’am?”
God! What she’d paid
To this fool to get laid!
Must she draw him a fucking big diagram?