The poor maid in whose knickers he’d ferreted,
Fate, sadly, worse than she merited,
Willing or not,
Was dismissed on the spot,
And the scion concerned disinherited.
World's largest collection of original limericks
Adults only
The poor maid in whose knickers he’d ferreted,
Fate, sadly, worse than she merited,
Willing or not,
Was dismissed on the spot,
And the scion concerned disinherited.
Not too awful, she had to confess:
Not much bleeding, no tears, no stress.
She’d quite liked her first fuck.
(Maybe sheer dumb luck).
“A bit slutty”, she thought, “though, I guess!”
Though her parents were terribly strict,
Despite morals they tried to inflict,
Still, they couldn’t have known
Things she did on her own,
Nor how often her pussy got licked!
She said “Look, I don’t mean to be petty,,
But Jesus! You’re filthy and sweaty!
You stink, your breath’s sour.
At least have a shower,
Or else it’s like fucking a yeti!
Quite renowned for her icy reserve,
She said “God, man! You’ve got some damn nerve!
And trespassing to boot!
Still, I’ll give you a root,
Though it’s more than you bloody deserve!
She was hot, but a bit of a floozy;
He rooted her in the jacuzzi.
He would have preferred
Some place less, like, absurd,
But, in fact, he just wasn’t that choosy.
The poor bloke, had he known in advance,
He was in with a bloody good chance,
Would have not wasted time
On sweet talk, (what a crime!)
And just gotten straight into her pants!
Quite enormous, much bigger than most…
All his bragging was no idle boast!
And as hard as a rock,
She thought, straddling his cock,
In more ways than one, deeply engrossed!
She’d said yes, and though not one to welch,
Still, her pussy was starting to squelch!
With each stroke of the cock
Of each bloke came the shock
Of a croak from her cunt, like a belch!
Though she had the poor jerk on a string,
It was only a casual fling.
He was handsome and funny,
Had plenty of money,
But such a small cock. No big thing.