How on earth did that old myth begin,
That a girl shouldn’t root kith and kin?
What with condoms and such,
Does it matter so much,
Whose damn cock she ends up with within?
Sexual logistics
The most timid girl comes to know lust.
Lust implies penetration, so must
Suggest fucking some way,
Straight, or weird, or gay;
Cunts, thank god, though, are pretty robust!
Coalition of the willing
At the bar he picked up a young redhead,
Nice tits, (but a bit of a dead-head),
And willing enough;
Didn’t mind he got rough,
Being spanked or hand-cuffed to the bed-head.
Bodice-rippers
Bodice-rippers, soft-porn, girlie fiction,
Fall down in their squeamish depiction
Of actual screwing…
Whatever they’re doing
Lacks mucus, and spitting, and friction.
What friends are for
She bumped into, and fucked, an old flame;
It was good fun. They laughed and she came.
Then he screwed her again.
What a prince among men!
That they’d broken up seemed such a shame!
Rude awakening
In her blog, she typed “What the fuck! Weird!
I got drunk, and when the fog cleared,
I showered and … Shit!
A tattoo on my tit?
And my pussy looks rather dog-eared.”
A kiss on the cheek
It began with a kiss on the cheek;
One thing led to the next, so to speak.
He was amply endowed,
(It would do a horse proud!)
She could hardly damn walk for a week!
A hard bargain
Her consent to a fuck was conditional;
Foreplay instructions, positional,
Time out to pee,
A quick blow job for free,
But the anal was ten bucks additional.
Fatherly advice
His old dad said “Mind you now, young Harold,
These floozies, so scanty-apparelled,
They ain’t just a cunt…
You can start at the front,
But don’t stop then… they’re all double-barrelled!
Sex doll
Although pretty, the girl was neurotic;
No sense of fun, nor the erotic.
She’d fuck on request,
Poker-faced, but, at best,
Lie stock-still, or act sort of robotic.