Her breasts swaying, the way she was bending,
Dress fallen away, his thoughts tending
To carnal delight,
Which the wench perhaps might
Be soliciting, bloody intending!
Category: PG
Parental guidance recommended
Convolution
Convoluted and pink as a coral,
Or soft fleshy-petalled and floral,
The labia minor
That grace the vagina
Do tempt one to pleasures immoral!
Lyme Regis
The cad took the girl down to Lyme Regis,
(The boarding house, although prestigious,
Still turned a blind eye
To the honeymoon lie,)
And abused her in ways quite egregious!
Self-sacrifice
“What a splendid big weapon, milord!”
She exclaimed, not the least overawed,
As she hitched up her skirt,
Shameless, vulgar young flirt,
Lined things up, and then fell on his sword!
The moons and Venus
Her big bosom, like twin moonish spheres,
Attracts lewd suggestions and leers,
Too crude to repeat,
Such as “Beautiful feet!
They’d look lovely up next to your ears!”
The lobbyist
She’d been caught having sex in the lobby.
“Right, Miss. What’s yer game?” said the bobby.
“Just innocent fun!”
She said. “What harm’s been done?
Just a girl’s little bit of a hobby!”
For better or worse
She was game, the young bride, quite intrepid;
She knew that the Lord was her shepherd,
But though he took charge,
His cock wasn’t that large…
And his lovemaking sort of, well, tepid.
The proof of the pudding
Well of course I’m a virgin! she’d say,
Once convinced she should go all the way,
But them damn doubting Thomases,
All lies n promises,
Soon found she wasn’t, someway.
Third time lucky
She had rather a way with the chaps,
Nymphomania, some said, perhaps.
Though she’d sometimes say no,
Maybe twice in a row,
Ask again, and she’d always relapse!
For services rendered
He said “Darling, please don’t be offended …
Good lord! No offence is intended!
As cheap as it sounds,
Please accept these few pounds,
As a payment for services rendered.”