Hardest part about going off grid,
When one wanted to wank, as one did,
Was the absence of porn…
It’s a bit of a yawn,
Rubbing blind, like when one was a kid.
Tag: wank
Morning glory
Waking up, she ducked under the blanket…
To suck it, or fuck it, or wank it?
She just licked the knob,
But did such a good job,
That he came in her mouth! And she drank it!
The bottom line
Look, I’m sorry to be a wet blanket,
She said. Spank my arse! Go on! Spank it!
I’ll give it a suck,
But I don’t want to fuck.
Here, give me your cock and I’ll wank it!
Teacher’s pets
She was rather well-stacked, for a teacher;
Small wonder, perhaps, she should feature,
In silly lewd schemes,
Closet wanks and wet dreams
Of the boys in her classes, poor creature!
Screen test
Her leaked sex tape, it now became clear,
Much wanked to, jokes made over beer,
Did not bring disgrace.
No, those tits (and her face),
And her arse helped kick-start her career!
Green fingers
What on earth must his friends, if he’s got any,
Think of his passion for botany?
What does he do?
Does he drink? Does he screw,
Or just wank, to relieve the monotony?
Faint heart , fair maiden
At the sight of her cunt his heart sank;
It was threatening, alien, dank,
Sort of turned inside-out
It might bite him, no doubt!
“No”, he muttered, “I think I’ll just wank.”
Glutted
His cold hands on this woman’s soft flank,
He regretted the cost, to be frank.
They’d had dinner, got drunk
Now his hard-on had shrunk.
He should just have stayed home, had a wank.
Disillusionment
While she sucked it, and gave it a crank,
She thought “This isn’t love, to be frank.
I’m just a receptacle,”
(Cynical, sceptical),
“Someone inside whom to wank!”
A nice touch
She’s flat-chested, with thin spindly shanks,
Doesn’t fuck, but likes mutual wanks.
That might not seem like much,
But she has a nice touch,
She’s discreet, and she always says thanks.