He said “Miss, would you please be so kind…?
Just roll over… I want you behind…
Not your pussy, my dear…
The other, I fear.
I hope you don’t very much mind!”
Tag: limerick
Small mercy
“Well,” she thought. “That was rather distressing!”
Whilst wiping her pussy, and dressing.
“Damn lecherous beast!
He came quickly, at least,
Barely in me! That’s some sort of blessing!”
Self-help
Finger-fucking her tight little slit…
Two! Three! Four! She gasps! God! They all fit!
Now she’s making a fist!
Plunge it in to the wrist…
Though it’s like her poor pussy will split!
Mateship
His best mate got the girl, to his sorrow,
But said “Tough luck, mate! You can borrow!
Mates share stuff! Alright!
So, I’ll fuck her tonight,
And I’ll lend her to you then, tomorrow!”
The bottom line
Look, I’m sorry to be a wet blanket,
She said. Spank my arse! Go on! Spank it!
I’ll give it a suck,
But I don’t want to fuck.
Here, give me your cock and I’ll wank it!
Defeated
His insistent demands grew so heated,
His groping so often repeated,
His hands up her dress,
On her tits! Her distress
So great…”God! Go on! Fuck me!” she bleated.
Sexual mechanics
Did the earth move? Well, no. Was it splendid?
In fact, she’d been glad when it ended;
The grunting, the sweat
Her bed smelly and wet…
The whole farce into which it descended!
Spoils of war
Genghis Khan and Attila the Hun,
Once the carnage and slaughter were done,
Raped the daughters and wives,
(Kindly sparing their lives),
A bit harsh, though some thought it quite fun.
By a process of deduction
She’d gone out to the pub and got plastered;
She woke up, her jeans still half-masted,
Her pussy awash!
“Strange,” she thought, then “Oh gosh!
That cute guy must have fucked me, the bastard!”
Not bashful
On reflection, she’d been a bit rash,
To have popped out her tits, done a flash!
The lads choked on their beers,
So, (clapping and cheers),
She’d bent down and showed them her gash!