She just live in a tar-paper shack,
Toilet just a damn hole out in back,
But a man needs a screw…
Take a bottle or two…
That ol’ gal’s goddam good in the sack!
Tag: limerick
Looks aren’t everything
She examined it, rather engrossed…
It would seem he was true to his boast…
For what beauty it lacked,
(A bit ugly, in fact)
It made up, being bigger than most!
Frog prince 1
“Come on babe,” he said. Gimme a snog!”
“Fuck!” she said. “I ain’t kissin’ no frog!
You ain’t no fuckin’ prince…
You don’t wanna be mince,
Better get yourself back in that bog!”
Frog prince 2
“Right away I knew somethin’ was wrong…
Clammy lips, and his tongue was so long!”
She said. (Gargle, spit, rinse).
“No, he weren’t no damn prince,
Just some smooth-talkin’ frog, all along!”
Nasty, brutish and short
The man’s lust was wild, brutish, unfettered…
Poor girl, she’d been groped, mauled, hard petted,
But strangely enough,
Although needlessly rough,
Soon her pussy was thoroughly wetted.
Stockholm syndrome
“I’ve been used by him, tied up, mistreated…
Been rooted rough too, like,” she tweeted.
“And maybe tonight,
If I’m lucky, it might,
If I’m naughty enough, be repeated!”
Forensics
He can tell by the signs where she’s lain…
Rumpled sheets, blood, the gluey grey stain.
When his mum says “What’s this?”
(And she’ll know it’s not piss,)
How the fuck will he ever explain?)
Diner
The gal’s easy enough on the eye,
When he studies her, just on the sly.
He comes in there most days,
But just orders and pays,
Takes his time over coffee and pie.
On bended knee
The damn fool’s gone and bought her a ring…
Got his dick on the end of a string!
He’s gone down on one knee…
Can the wanker not see
She just wanted a bit of a fling?
Truth in reporting
“We made love… or, to be more precise…
Well… he fucked me… in fact, fucked me twice!”
She said. “Heavens above!
Not a word about love.
But to do it again would be nice!”