Said Miss Moxham, appealingly yawning,
“I wake up so horny each morning:
You’d better watch out
And not wave it about,
Or you’ll find yourself fucked without warning!”
Tag: limerick
Cherry liquer
Having got herself drunk, but not very,
On one little glassful of sherry,
She cheekily giggled,
And sexily wriggled,
And offered the waiter her cherry!
Tully
A disgusting young fellow from Tully
Made love to a girl in a gully:
Though damn poor excuse,
She was known to be loose,
And had no reputation to sully!
City girls
City girls have tattoos on their tits
And gold rings in their nipples and clits;
They give blow-jobs in bars,
Don’t wear knickers or bras,
And their jeans slide up into their slits.
City life is all sex, booze and glitz:
Every party’s a sexual blitz.
City girls love to drink,
Then they flirt and they wink,
Lift their skirts and expose their pink bits.
City girls wear short dresses with slits;
You can see a girl’s snatch when she sits.
They all shave round their cunts,
They’ll try anything once,
And they’ll fuck a chair-leg, if it fits.
City girls don’t know when to say quits;
Rules and etiquette give them the shits.
Ask a girl for a screw
And she’ll say “Yeah, you’ll do,
Though I know I’m a slut,” she admits.
Tickets on herself
She cried “Oh! It’s the absolute ticket!
Wherever you want, you can stick it!
And if it gets shitty,
Just wipe on my titty,
Or if you prefer, I could lick it!”
Teddi
There’s a horny young lady called Teddi,
Whose morals are somewhat unsteady:
She always resists,
But if someone insists,
She’ll say yes, and have wet pants already!
Eyes bigger than her belly
She said “God, though its big, I can take it!
You think it won’t fit, but I’ll make it,
With mucus and spit,
Though my fanny may split!
Stick it in, till I burst, or you break it!”
Susie
She’s a trollop, a cot-case, is Susie:
She likes to get naked and boozy.
She has sex in bars
And in doorways and cars,
Then, next day, wakes up woozy and oozy.
Historical context
Said Giselle, as she loosened her stays
“I’ve had thousands and thousands of lays…
I remember the last,
But the rest of my past
Is one horny, delirious haze!”
Domestic bliss
With a fanny so moist that it squishes
When scrubbing or doing the dishes,
She goes about nude,
To be readily screwed
Anywhere or whenever he wishes!