Yeah, she knows anal’s cool, all the fashion,
But when he first tried, she went ashen,
And told him “Fuck! No!”
Now she does it, although
With her teeth gritted, not with great passion.
Tag: anal sex
Whore-ticulture
Quite the lady, she said, self-assured,
“The buggery, yes, I endured,
But go back in front?
Lady garden or cunt,
I don’t want the thing bloody manured!”
Beyond the call of duty
Though the chap was superbly endowed,
She was plucky, the lass, quite uncowed.
Yes, she’d fuck him, she swore,
Front and back, and what’s more,
All ten inches, she recklessly vowed!
Sneaky
Her seducer was, well, pretty sneaky.
She found anal sex a bit freaky.
She wasn’t to know,
All those years ago,
That her asshole would now be so leaky.
Terms of reference
Virgin? She? Could he be more exact?
Did he mean the straight sexual act?
She’d screwed anally, orally;
Could she still, morally,
Claim still to be, for a fact?
Getting off, getting on
To delay the onset of dementia,
Some playful erotic adventure
Works well, so it’s said;
Anal sex, giving head,
Useful tip: Ladies, take out your denture!
The gamut
First she satisfied him by hand, orally,
(Somehow, that seemed better, morally);
Strangely, quite zanily,
Then also anally,
Finally also vaginally, sorrily.*
* Imperfect rhythm in the last line, I know, but irresistible.
Second prize
His first time, late at night, in the park…
Where’s her cunt? Take a stab in the dark…
It was warm, it was tight…
But, what with the poor light…
He was just a bit wide of the mark!
Fatherly advice
His old dad said “Mind you now, young Harold,
These floozies, so scanty-apparelled,
They ain’t just a cunt…
You can start at the front,
But don’t stop then… they’re all double-barrelled!
Post-feminism
A post-feminist girl, analytical,
Saw sex as mostly political;
So lower class,
Being fucked in the arse!
Yet to not do so seemed hypocritical!