If you like your girls buxom and hairy,
That’s fine, but perhaps a bit scary.
If wanting to root
Girls with jugs and hirsute
You might fancy a job in a dairy.
Fatal attraction
Though the girl had a cunt like a chasm,
When fucked, and she came to orgasm,
The rash fellow who
Had embarked on a screw
Would be squashed, balls and all, by the spasm.
White lies
As he nudged up towards where her hole lay,
He was heard, in a voice to cajole, say
“I love you, I swear,
And your hymen won’t tear,
If I don’t push my prick in the whole way!”
Medusa
Her loins gripped, like the coils of Medusa,
The prick of her would-be seducer,
Who cried, “I shan’t hurt you!
I’ll honour your virtue…
If you could just make your thighs looser!
Bush ballad
She was blessed with a lush, bouncy bush,
Through which, gosh, it was lovely to push!
But a faulty hair-dryer,
One night, caused a fire:
Sniff. What’s that? Whizz! Crackle! Bang! Whoosh!
Different strokes
Censorship is all mirrors and smoke,
Censors men wearing decency’s cloak,
Who watch porn all day long,
Call it evil and wrong,
But meanwhile, can’t resist a nice stroke.
Booze and romance
She was dressed in a way to provoke,
To turn on any red-blooded bloke,
Who perceived a fair chance,
After booze and romance,
She might just let him give her a poke.
Unbearable lightness
She wore jeans of such indecent tightness,
And thinness and colour and lightness,
That when they got wet,
From the rain, or her sweat,
A man’s thoughts deviated from rightness.
Dark thoughts
To us all come dark thoughts and unbidden,
Unspoken, consuming, but hidden,
Of old taboos broken,
And strange cravings woken,
Of acts and relations forbidden.
Intramural sports
A rebellious young lady from Dural
Found life there predictably rural.
She liked being screwed
Getting drunk and tattooed:
She was sort of a fuckable mural.