She danced helluva fine hootchy kootchy!
Her g string was gen-yoo-ine Gucci.
Between sets, she’d cruise,
Sit on laps, drink some booze,
And for ten bucks, she’d get real smoochy!
Tag: limerick
Model citizen
Yes, she said,I’m a lingerie model.
Good money, a bit of a doddle.
Just root the designer,
Then wax your vagina,
Smile nicely and try not to waddle!
Unhappy snap
A nude picture on Snapchat, a joke.
Well, he’d seemed like a nice enough bloke,
But things started to spiral;
Her pussy went viral,
She found out next day when she woke.
And she probably cheats at cards
Amply bosomed, nice bum and long-legged
“Any chance of a root? Please!” he begged.
She said “Yes. For a price.”
Not quite love, although nice,
But the bloody bitch bloody reneged!
Forty’s the new thirty
Maybe forty, though still pretty spritely,
He fancies her, wrongly or rightly,
Nice tits, a nice bum,
Maybe somebody’s mum,
But she’s squeezing his dick pretty tightly!
The bridge club
Though her husband was rich and adoring,
She found married life rather boring.
She’d cruise in her car,
In a short dress, no bra,
Or drop into some bar, do some whoring!
Making do
Randy, reckless, what might do the job?
She thought. Cucumber? Corn on the cob?
Carrot? Candle? Shampoo?
A wine bottle? Her shoe?
Wait! That’s it! The stair banister knob!
Picking and choosing
With both hands she took hold of his shaft.
“Like a pick handle, boyo!” she laughed.
“Such a knob! Fuck me puce!
To not put it to use
A damn woman would have to be daft!”
Diabolical
Clank and thump. Whistle, grind, hiss of steam!
Culmination of some evil scheme!
The shaft cranks to and fro …
Steel dildo! God! No!
The machine roar drowns out the girl’s scream!
Mechanisation
The machine gleamed, a menacing sheen,
The huge cock part, at least, fairly clean …
But the pistons and gears!
The noise as it nears!
Too late! Strapped in place! None too keen.