There’s a whole new erogenous zone
That’s revealed when the lady lies prone:
The alternative passage,
(Plus clitoral massage)
Is nice, but a bugger alone.
Tag: anal
Heavens to Betsy
Betsy Jones is no sexual sluggard,
Prefers sex, in fact, when it’s rugged.
She likes being eaten,
And tied up and beaten
And doesn’t mind much being buggered.
The work-around
“Oh you cannot put that there,” she said,
“Until after the day we are wed,
For I’m saving that niche,
But you can, if you wish,
Put your thing in my bottom instead!”
Ill repute
Lady Sarah Smythe-Jones, by repute,
Leads a life, in a word, dissolute:
She drinks only champagne,
Likes her sex mixed with pain,
And quite likes the alternative route.
Household discipline
On pain of disgrace and dismissal,
One’s maid should respond to one’s whistle,
And, lifting her smock,
Part her cheeks for one’s cock,
Or submit to the cane, strap or bristle.
The help
Said my butler, the soul of discretion,
Composed both of voice and expression,
“Milord, might I look,
While you’re fucking with cook?
And a word, sir: she fancies it Grecian.”
Magnanimity
In the clipped tones befitting her class,
Said the Duchess, face down in the grass,
“Though you’re hardly my equal,
By way of a sequel
To straight sex, I give you my arse!”
Honest mistake
One could honestly publish a book
About Alfons , our myopic cook:
What a jolly old farce,
When he stuffed the maid’s arse,
Not the turkey’s (like which it did look!)
To the manner born
If not born to the manner, begin
By acquiring a taste for good gin,
And when plumbing the arse
Of a woman of class
Have a fellow to play violin.
Keep smiling
Bondage sounded, like, edgy and fun…
Shoulda pulled up her panties and run!
Bein’ tied up and buggered…
Fuck! Pretty damn rugged!
A pain in the arse! ‘Scuse the pun.