Since she doesn’t wear knickers, Louise
Enjoys all through the day a cool breeze.
For a quickie at work
It’s a wonderful lurk,
And it saves her some time when she pees.
French letters
When I asked could Miss Smith take a letter,
She said “If it makes you feel better,
But really, without,
The old dull in-and-out
Is more friendly somehow, and much wetter!”
Night
A disease of the organs internal
Affects a bewhiskered old colonel.
He’s also insane
Which might help to explain
His unsavoury habits nocturnal.
Coquette
A young girl, mostly shy and coquettish,
Evinces a singular fetish:
She has to be stripped,
And be tied up and whipped,
Before she becomes at all wettish!
Animal husbandry
Farmer Rogers does things with his chooks
Not in animal husbandry books.
Before wringing the necks
Of his hens he has sex
With the bird which he afterwards cooks.
Suspense
A young man, rather smart, but a bully,
One tied a girl’s legs to a pulley,
Attached to the ceiling,
Thus subtly revealing
His object of interest more fully.
Five
An adventurous girl, for a bet,
Went to bed with five men she’d just met.
She said “threesomes are fun,
More than just one-on-one
So I thought I might try a sextet.”
Smelly feet
An executive chap from the bank,
Hires ladies his bottom to spank,
Whom he sometimes then screws,
While he sniffs at their shoes:
As a rule though, he’d just as soon wank!
Appeasement
Their depraved appetites to appease,
Certain men pay exorbitant fees
To a smart woman who
Found that, rather than screw
They’re quite happy to watch while she pees.
Three
I’m convinced, and I’m sure you’ll agree
That it’s more fun to fuck between three.
Whether one girl or two,
I’m not much concerned who,
Just as long as the third one is me!