She contracted her service to render,
And threw herself open to to tender:
She placed a reserve,
To discourage the perv,
But took bids irrespective of gender.
Supply and demand
In this sad economic recession,
It’s five dollars less for a session:
The best whore in town
Has her asking price down,
And some offer a student concession!
Putting on her face
To present to the world a neat quim,
One should give one’s short curlies a trim,
Add a touch of Chanel
To augment its own smell,
And dab lipstick and rouge round the rim.
Stroke play
Said a young tennis player, named Polly,
“I think making love is just jolly,
To athletic blokes,
With good depth to their strokes,
And who play my return on the volley!”
That’s amore
A pain
Over the fence
Mrs Jones said to Hilda, next door,
“Having sex is just one more dull chore!
Don’t you think that that’s so?”
And dull Hilda said “No,
Your man Jim makes me want more and more!”
Floral tribute
My sweet mistress, the lovely Miss Millie,
Declared I was perfectly silly
To loosely refer
To what wasn’t, to her,
Even nice, as “her delicate lily”!
The scent of a woman
That most sensuous woman, Michelle,
Oozes sex: men fall under her spell!
Men have come in their pants
From one smouldering glance
And some others get off on her smell!
Loose knickers
If a woman whose knickers are loose
Has sufficient secretion of juice,
If a fellow is quick,
He can slip in his dick,
Where and when it will be of most use!