AO – Page 330 – Pete's Limericks

Begging the question

She was pretty one couldn’t refute,
But the question, of course, remained moot;
Would she spurn a man’s love?
And when push came to shove,
If asked nicely enough, would she root?

Rustic idyll

He was just a crude bumpkin, a yokel,
Uncultured, not terribly vocal,
But God, could he hump!
And a cock like a stump!
And what’s more, she thought, handily local.

The gamut

First she satisfied him by hand, orally,
(Somehow, that seemed better, morally);
Strangely, quite zanily,
Then also anally,
Finally also vaginally, sorrily.*

* Imperfect rhythm in the last line, I know, but irresistible.

In retrospect

It was moot, which affected her worse;
Oral sex, which she thought quite perverse,
Or his cock in her cunt,
Being fucked from in front,
Or rolled over and fucked in reverse!

Delicious uncertainty

How much more such delight could she bear?
Not to know, and in fact not to care,
Though a little perplexed,
Where he rooted her next;
In her mouth or her cunt or elsewhere!

In heat

Pussy not only moist, but damn soggy,
Deliciously, squishiously boggy,
She said “As you see,
I’m turned on as can be.
Fuck me frontwards and backwards and doggy!

The laying on of hands

Is it sinful? she wondered, undressing,
This touching myself, or a blessing?
If sinning I am,
Then I don’t give a damn,
And won’t trouble the priest by confessing!

Making a virtue of necessity

Well of course she resisted at first,
Having felt she’d been rather coerced,
But then, much as she had,
She thought “This ain’t so bad.
As roots go, in fact, far from the worst!”

From here to eternity

On account of her Christian belief,
Giving in did occasion some grief,
But then, all said and done
She thought fucking quite fun,
Not too messy, and blessedly brief.