AO – Page 246 – Pete's Limericks

If wishes were fishes

“It’s no use just wishing and hoping,
Just sitting around all day, moping.
Dress up!” said her Mum.
“Twitch your tits and your bum,
And go out, get yourself a good groping!”

Alternative truth

Just a big-titted, dumb bottle-blonde,
But of whom he’d become rather fond…
Her orgasms were fake,
(Rolled up eyes, for god’s sake!)
He just sort of felt like he’d been conned.

Divertimento

As she played with her pussy, she hummed,
Shiny lips falling open, much thumbed,
Spread invitingly wide,
As her hand slipped inside,
Pearly clitoris joyfully strummed!

Plush

Splendid tits, a spectacular tushy!
Her pussy untamed, wild and bushy
Concealed her cunt,
(Well, at least from in front),
But a root, when once got, was damn cushy!

Zip file

She was built like a dream, the young stripper.
Great tits and great arse. What a ripper!
And boy, could she dance!
He’d have come in his pants,
Had his dick not got caught in his zipper.

Gymnastics

Girls in leotards! All rather scenic.
They bend, stretch, do things callisthenic,
Seams strained at their crotches,
Damp, pussy-stained blotches!
Damn tasty, though quite unhygienic!

Low blow

As a rule, she took things in her stride,
Sort of gritted her teeth, let it slide.
Slick indeed! Up the bum!
She was feeling so glum
That she could have just curled up and cried!

Pride cometh before a fall

“Oh good Lord!” poor Miss Audubon sighed.
“Bound and gagged, God knows what up inside!”
It might well have been fun,
If less nastily done…
It was simply a matter of pride.

Misused

“I ain’t sayin’ I ain’t gonna miss yous,”
She said to them, “Just, I have issues.
You both fuck me rough,
And get jealous and stuff,
And I’m over it! Pass me the tissues!”