If you go out, my daughter, to ride,
Then sit side-saddle, never astride,
Or else, when you are mounted,
You might be discounted,
As being too loose and too wide!
Month: December 2024
The benefit of hindsight
Said Miss Wrigley, “I might have refused,
Had I known I’d be sorely abused:
You have plied with such strength
Your inordinate length
That my fanny is swollen and bruised!”
On reflection
If she’d only had time to reflect…
But she didn’t so much as suspect
His unworthy intentions,
Before his dimensions
Persuaded her not to object
Pussy (adj)
Other people’s small parts may drip pus,
With all sorts of concomitant fuss:
It’s a nuisance, of course,
Which provokes great remorse
In those poor folk concerned, (never us!)
Inept
If, persisting, you only produce,
Cries of “Sir, you’re a pain, and obtuse!”
Then you’d better accept
That you’re less than adept,
And make do with the old self-abuse.
Cheeky little thing
A daring young girl, for a prank,
Bought a swimsuit, obscene, to be frank.
It was hard to ignore it
The first time she wore it,
Impossible after it shrank!
All cats are grey in the dark
A young fellow from smoggy Port Kembla
Was having a late-night knee-trembler…
But somehow or other,
He fucked the girl’s mother,
Whose daughter did, granted, resemble her.
Hi Jean
Should you contemplate something obscene,
With a raunchy young lady called Jean,
Then at least wash your hands
After fondling her glands;
Well, who knows where the trollop has been?
News from the front
An unfortunate girl called Maria
Developed the dread gonorrhoea:
Her husband took fright
When she told him her plight,
And discreetly advanced to the rear.
Greased lightning
A young lady I know is quite manic,
Her manner of fucking galvanic:
She starts at a pace,
Like it’s some sort of race,
And from then on, just hang and don’t panic!