Plain talkin’

“Would you kindly stop sayin’ I’m pretty”,
She said. “‘Cause I ain’t, more’s the pity.
Quit talkin’ ’bout love. It
Fair sickens me! Shove it!
And get your damn hand off my titty!”

Dude

Sarah Janesaid the badge on her titty.
A smart bastard, down from the city,
Pot-bellied and bald,
Said “What’s t’other one called?”
Which, he thought, bloody fool, rather witty.