In a spot where nobody could see
Lurked a blissfully fortunate flea.
He caused moans of delight,
In her bed, in the night:
Were but such happy sounds caused by me!
Tag: limerick
Night sweat
When I dream, every night it’s the same:
A young woman keeps calling my name.
Last night, the worst yet,
I woke up in a sweat
And cried out in despair and I came!
Coming up short
His libidinous plans came to nought,
Since his penis was woefully short.
What was thought to be it,
Or at least a snug fit,
Was in fact a venereal wart.
Romantic serial
She was gorgeous, her voice was melodic,
Our romance, alas, episodic.
She liked being on top,
And she’d fuck till she’d drop,
As she came in a manner spasmodic.
Monkey business
An unfortunate chimpanzee male
Attempted to little avail
To gain by coercion
A penile insertion:
It seems that thereby hangs a tail!
Underarmour
A fastidious lady called Kay
Regards sex with a certain dismay:
Not her moral beliefs,
But her girdle and briefs,
And her panty-hose get in the way.
Tigress
Though her immodest pose was inviting,
And touching herself was exciting,
Though horny as hell,
I knew only too well
That to to fuck her risked scratching and biting.
Guilt trip
Having plunged himself in to the hilt,
He was seized by irrational guilt,
And though firmly resolved,
His libido dissolved
And his untimely sperm-spurt was spilt.
Phobia
Every time Howard’s sex-organ firms
He gets anxious, and fidgets and squirms:
He can’t contemplate sex,
So intense and complex
Is his deep morbid fear of germs!
The lady at her toilet
With her long silky hair in loose coils,
She bathes nightly in Indian oils,
Anoints her vagina
With perfumes from China:
Oh, fortunate man she thus spoils!