“It’s not fair!” Claire complained, with a pout,
“After going for so long without!
A few moments of bliss,
And a girl comes to this,
And me cath’lic, and somewhat devout!”
Tag: catholic
The laying on of hands
Is it sinful? she wondered, undressing,
This touching myself, or a blessing?
If sinning I am,
Then I don’t give a damn,
And won’t trouble the priest by confessing!
Undertow
Father Davies, the priest at All Hallows,
Red-faced, wheezing loud as a bellows,
Plunged deep into sin,
(He thought all the way in),
Though, as yet, he but dipped in the shallows.
Pastoral matters
As a Catholic priest, he eschews
Married life, and should also refuse,
As a man of the cloth,
And on pain of God’s wrath,
Sex with those whom he’s prone to abuse.
Blotted copy-book
A good catholic woman disdains
Using condoms, which rather explains,
If she doesn’t abstain,
How one knows where she’s lain,
From the wet spots and seminal stains.
Old time religion
The old bishops of Rome once exhorted
That heretics had to be slaughtered,
Flayed, burnt at the stake,
(Though sometimes by mistake),
Jews and Protestants hung, drawn and quartered.
The papist
He’s respectable, shy and a papist,
In secret though, sickly escapist,
And when not at church
He submits to the birch;
He’s a pedophile too, and a rapist.